


Cloudy Skies

by Dark Star Of Chaos (DarkDecepticon)



Category: Transformers Generation One
Genre: Angst, M/M, Missing Scene, Nightmares, Pining, Second Chances
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-31
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:06:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26216866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkDecepticon/pseuds/Dark%20Star%20Of%20Chaos
Summary: Fate tore Skyfire and Starscream apart. It's up to them to find their way back to each other.
Relationships: Skyfire/Starscream
Comments: 29
Kudos: 32
Collections: SkyStar Week 2020





	1. Fleeting

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little story written for SkyStar Week, organized by overlorddrax on Tumblr. This is Day One: Hope/Grief. Enjoy!

If there was a greater insult than being near the top of the command chain but left under the supervision of a subordinate, Starscream couldn't think of one. Being stuck with guard duty was bad enough at the best of times, but guard duty under the watchful optic of _Skywarp_? Admittedly that was temporary since Megatron had summoned Skywarp to transport freshly acquired alloys back to the temple where Starscream now stood watch, but still!

The worst part was that he was the only one being punished for bringing back faulty steel, even though Thundercracker was just as guilty. Sure, they'd both been put on guard duty and Skywarp had been in charge of both of them before being called away, but this was the sort of plebeian task Thundercracker did all the time. It wasn't a punishment if it was expected of him anyway.

If Megatron's intention had been to treat them equally - which Starscream doubted - he'd failed miserably. Not that Megatron had ever been one to play fair, least of all where Starscream was concerned. It was far more likely that this affront had been deliberate, which was all the more infuriating because Starscream wasn't the one who'd-

"Hey, will you keep it down?" Thundercracker demanded. "No one cares about your dented pride."

Starscream paused his internal rant to glare at him. "I didn't say anything!"

"You're muttering," Thundercracker replied. "Loud enough for me to hear most of it."

Starscream's scowl deepened as he turned to face Thundercracker properly. "Well, if it's bothering you that much, maybe you should stand guard somewhere else. I'm sure there are plenty of Autobots skulking in the ruins."

"Yeah, well if there are, I'll see them coming just fine from up here."

Something about the singular pronoun felt accusatory. Like Thundercracker didn't think Starscream would notice if enemies did show up.

"It's your fault we got left here in the first place!" Starscream snapped.

Outrage flashed across Thundercracker's face. "My-? It's a job that needs _done_. Sorry it isn't glorious enough for you."

"It _wouldn't_ need done if you-"

"Don't you _dare_ finish that sentence," Thundercracker interrupted. "Who was it that said the steel would work? 'Cause it sure wasn't me."

"It would have worked! Clearly you did something wrong when the weapon frame was assembled."

Starscream half-expected Thundercracker to punch him. His face was contorted and his fists were clenched. But after a moment he just cycled a short, deep ventilation and stepped back. Starscream started to relax, letting his wings settle from their aggressive angle.

But then Thundercracker spoke again.

"Has anyone told you you've been acting a lot like Megatron lately?"

A punch would have hurt less. Starscream made a furious, guttural noise and started to raise one arm, but he stopped himself on realizing that shooting Thundercracker would only prove him right. He stabbed a finger at the ruins below instead.

"Enough standing around! We are going down there, and if there are any Autobots, we flush them out and take them down."

Thundercracker tensed. "No way! Megatron'll blow a fuse if he finds out we abandoned our posts."

"Well then, he'd better not find out. Now move!"

* * *

Starscream hadn't expected there to be any Autobots lurking around; not really. With the other Decepticons currently menacing a human village, that would be the top priority of every Autobot for miles around. But it was a convenient excuse to get away from Thundercracker, and it made Starscream feel better to give orders. With Skywarp off playing fetch, he was in charge again.

He didn't venture far from the temple, though. If there were any Autobots nearby, seeing their target seemingly abandoned might draw them out, and Starscream wanted to be close enough to take advantage of that possibility. A part of him even hoped a few Autobots would show up; it would be a delightful subversion if Megatron's attempt to humiliate him allowed him to claim a victory.

A flash of white between two crumbling walls drew him from his thoughts. Starscream froze where he crouched next to a similar wall, staring at the now-empty gap. Had that been an Autobot? Surely it couldn't have been. There were several Autobots on Earth with prominent white coloration, but even the medic wasn't all white. Nor was he big enough to have been… whatever that was.

If it was a bot, Starscream only knew one it could have been. But that wasn't possible. Skyfire was dead.

"Am I seeing ghosts, then?" he asked himself quietly. Not that he believed in ghosts, but a hallucination of a dead mech was functionally the same. It was a pity the Decepticons had no medics on Earth, or he would have his optics checked.

He shook his head, dismissing the flash, and started to turn away.

Something massive and white appeared from the ruins. Starscream stilled once again, not daring to even look directly at the shape. It was definitely a bot, hunched over in a futile attempt to make its frame less visible. He couldn't see its face, but its head turned as it looked around. After a few moments, the bot slowly straightened to full height. A strangled whimper left Starscream's throat.

Skyfire. But it couldn't be him, it wasn't possible. He was dead, crashed in the arctic. True, Starscream hadn't seen the body, but he'd seen the memorial the Autobots left at the site. This had to be a hallucination, or- It wasn't real, whatever it was.

The phantom was approaching the temple. Starscream turned his head slowly to keep it in sight, half expecting - half hoping - that it would disappear the moment he focused on it properly. But it didn't. It reached the temple steps and started climbing, a gun appearing in one hand as it went. Starscream watched it numbly, torn between activating his weapons and shutting off his optics.

The shadows at the base of the temple moved. Thundercracker stepped into the open, looking right at the bot above him, and Starscream's spark clenched.

It wasn't a hallucination. It was real. It was _Skyfire_. He was alive and everyone, Autobots and Decepticons alike, had written him off too soon. Starscream should have known better, should have dug him back out of the ice to make sure. But that didn't matter now, because Skyfire was alive and Starscream could talk to him. He could explain himself, maybe even fix things. Convince Skyfire that he'd been too hasty in turning his back on the Decepticons. They would still have to deal with Megatron, but he might be forgiving if they played up how little Skyfire truly knew of the war.

Thundercracker was pointing a rifle at Skyfire's back. The uncertain emotions coiled around Starscream's spark turned to panic.

"Yeah, but even without our new weapon, I can fry your circuits extra-crispy." Thundercracker's voice carried easily in the stillness. Skyfire spun around, finally allowing Starscream to see his face. It was slack with shock, and his optics were wide with fear.

He hadn't been afraid when Starscream shot him in the arctic. There hadn't been time for that.

"Megatron would love it," Thundercracker continued; then to Starscream's surprised relief, lowered his weapon. "But that geeky Starscream would take all the credit."

Geeky? Thundercracker was seriously going to pass on shooting someone just so Starscream wouldn't claim the victory? Not that he was complaining, given the circumstances. Starscream stood slowly and crept toward the temple, hoping Skyfire was too focused on Thundercracker to notice and give away his approach. Thankfully, that seemed to be the case. Even with his weapons down, Thundercracker was still advancing on Skyfire, driving him towards the top of the temple.

"On the other hand," Thundercracker went on, giving Skyfire no chance to speak, "if I let you wreck our new weapon, Megatron might blame Starscream. Which would make me very happy."

Every scrap of relief Starscream had felt vanished in a surge of fury. Thundercracker knew how Megatron treated Starscream and he was still willing to get him in trouble? To betray the Decepticons just to get him _hurt_?

"Thundercracker, you putrid traitor!" He hadn't meant to speak. The words just burst from him, drawing the alarmed gazes of both mechs. This time, Starscream didn't hesitate to level a rifle at Thundercracker. Didn't think twice about firing.

Thundercracker ducked. The shot passed harmlessly over him and struck Skyfire square in the chest. Skyfire fell soundlessly, off the edge of the pyramid and to the ground below. Landing with a crash, then moving no more.

Starscream stared after him, mind reeling. He had just shot Skyfire. _Again_. He hadn't meant to, but he had, and now…

Now he couldn't fix anything. Skyfire wouldn't forgive him for this. Wouldn't give him a chance to explain himself. He might not even survive being shot, his armor was still civilian grade. Starscream had been given a second chance, and he'd botched it in less than a minute.

"So much for the Autobot intruder," he muttered.

He tried to ignore the pain in his spark as he turned to Thundercracker, and away from Skyfire's unmoving frame.


	2. Cold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little thing this time, for the prompt of Memories and Regrets.

_Pain burst through Skyfire's chest, lancing across his sensors. He cried out; fell. The ice at his back was cold and hard, as unforgiving as the laser that had just torn through his plating._

_There was movement above him. A sleek red and silver frame, bright against a backdrop of starless sky. Its face was lost in shadow, the only visible features a pair of angry red optics. Burning bright, but so cold. Cold like ice._

_Skyfire couldn't move. His mouth was open, but he couldn't speak. Couldn't scream._

_The familiar, beloved mech raised an arm, and leveled the smoking muzzle of a rifle at Skyfire's head._

* * *

Skyfire came awake with a jolt. A tingle swept through his limbs as sensors were abruptly brought online, dispelling the chill of the ice. But the pain in his chest lingered, and he had to raise a hand to smooth, undamaged plating to convince himself that he was okay. That he hadn't just been shot at point blank range.

He lay still for a moment more, then pushed himself up on trembling arms and looked around. No red optics stared at him from the shadows. No pale wings glinted with light reflected from his own optics. There was no one in the small room except him.

Skyfire took a slow, shuddering ventilation and dropped his head into his hands. Just a dream. It had only been a dream. But though the pain in his chest was fading, the cold crept back into his frame, making him shiver. It hadn't been _only_ a dream.

He glanced around him again, this time looking for the blanket Ratchet had given him. It was more a patchwork of tarps - nothing made by humans was even remotely near large enough for Skyfire - but it was comforting all the same.

He found it crumpled against the wall beside him and drew it around himself, pulling his legs to his chest to cover them too. According to Ratchet, the cold was illusory; nothing more than a glitch in his neural net from being frozen for so long. He wasn't actually as cold as he felt.

The knowledge didn't help, though. The tarp-blanket did.

Once he was fully cocooned, he leaned back against the wall and shut off his optics. The furious red stare of his attacker - his mate - blazed at him from the darkness of his mind. He stared back, but couldn't find any anger of his own to retaliate with. Confusion, yes. Hurt, fear, and sorrow, yes. All of those. But he couldn't be angry.

 _What happened to you?_ Skyfire asked the phantom presence silently. _What made you so cold?_

Starscream didn't answer. But if Skyfire focused on the accusatory gaze long enough, he almost thought he could see his own pain reflected back at him.


	3. Rain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Late chapter is late. But at least I'm here in time for Day Three: Loneliness/Gentleness.

Skyfire wasn't having a good day. Granted, most of his time on Earth had been unhappy, between waking up to a war and having frequent nightmares about a mech who had once meant everything to him. But even by that new standard of normal, his day was going badly.

After all, most days didn't involve being captured by the source of those nightmares.

Skyfire shifted against the cliff face behind him, looking for a more comfortable position for his bound arms, and shivered as rainwater seeped between his plates. He wasn’t injured, at least; Starscream had shot him with a null-ray this time, not a laser. But he didn’t like his chances of escaping unharmed. Not with the way Starscream had been behaving.

He was standing still now, watching the rain fall on the forest before them. But for the most part he had been restless: pacing, snarling at Skyfire if he tried to speak, muttering to himself. Occasionally he sank into a crouch nearby for a few minutes before surging up again. As far as Skyfire could tell, the one thing he hadn’t done was comm the Decepticons for help with his large captive.

It was both alien and uncomfortably familiar. Starscream had never been one to sit still when he had a lot on his mind. But this was different, almost frenzied. He seemed... upset. At least, that was how Skyfire would have interpreted it if Starscream had still been the bot he remembered. Without that familiarity, he didn’t know what to make of it.

Skyfire laid his head against the rock wall and looked at Starscream again.

"Are you all right?"

His voice was quiet, little more than a whisper lost to the patter of falling rain. Somehow, Starscream heard him anyway. Red optics flicked away from the water-laden trees before them to focus on Skyfire instead, scrutinizing him with an intensity that would have been frightening just a few hours ago.  _ Had _ been frightening.

Now, though, Skyfire held his gaze evenly.

Starscream turned back to the forest, mouth twisting as though he was repressing the urge to say something. He probably was. He'd been too quiet since Skyfire found him here to not be holding something back.

"I've been better," he said at last.

It was more than Skyfire would have dared to hope for. He knew better than to ask anything more - he shouldn't have asked at all - but he couldn't help it.

"Is there anything I can do?"

This time Starscream's lips pulled back in a grimace that bared his fangs, though Skyfire couldn't tell if it was anger or pain. Despite the display, Starscream's answer was a quiet hiss. "It's a little late for that."

Skyfire watched him for a moment more, then sighed and turned his own attention to the forest. 

Starscream rounded on him without warning, hands clenched into tight, trembling fists. Skyfire couldn't repress a flinch. A low growl rumbled in Starscream's chest, audible over the rain. He came to stand over Skyfire and stared down at him, the same uncertain blend of emotions still clear on his face.

It was far harder to make optical contact with the maybe-pain than with the harsh glare that had come before it. After only a moment Skyfire had to look away, drawing his legs up defensively.

"What's the matter?" Starscream asked. "Afraid of the big bad Decepticon?"

He leaned down, planting his hands on Skyfire's knees. It was the first time they'd touched since Starscream cuffed him, and Skyfire couldn’t help noticing how warm Starscream’s hands were against his own chilled plating. Wide wings angled above him, blocking the rain. Skyfire found his optics drifting back up, to the scowling face so close to his. The difference in size between them meant that Starscream wasn't much taller than him, even like this. But under that furious gaze, from a bot he'd once known so well, Skyfire felt very small.

He licked his lips, then nodded.

Starscream's optics flickered. He slowly straightened again, still staring at Skyfire, but his hands now hung loose at his sides. Skyfire bowed his head.

"I'm not afraid of you," he said quietly. "But when you start acting like a Decepticon, yes. It scares me."

"There is no  _ act _ ," Starscream snarled. "I  _ am _ a Decepticon."

Skyfire wanted to argue. He wanted to point out that as a Decepticon, Starscream should have already turned him over to the rest of the faction. Wanted to explain that he didn't  _ want _ to be afraid of Starscream, and that it was easier to think of the bot he missed and the bot Starscream had become as different people. He wanted to admit how confusing it was to long for and fear a mech at the same time.

In the end, he said nothing.

Hands settled on his knees again, more lightly than before. "You shouldn't have come out here alone. It isn't safe for  _ civilians _ ."

Starscream said the last word like it was an insult. Skyfire ignored it. He was a civilian for all practical purposes, after all, and an Autobot in allegiance only.

"I didn't realize the Decepticons controlled enough of Earth that going outside would be dangerous," he said instead.

"That isn't an excuse for carelessness," Starscream snapped. "Haven't your Autobot buddies told you  _ never _ to approach an enemy without calling in your coordinates first? With your fighting ability, you should have retreated and commed for backup the moment you noticed me!"

"You didn't."

Starscream's fingers dug into Skyfire's knees. "Different circumstances. You had already seen me. Plus, I  _ captured _ you."

Skyfire shut off his optics. He didn't know enough of military matters to argue, and he was too tired to care. A strut-deep, aching exhaustion weighed far more heavily on his frame than Starscream did. "So what now?" he asked wearily.

He wasn't surprised when Starscream didn't reply. But he was surprised when one hand moved from his knee to his face, softly stroking his cheek. A part of him wanted to jerk back and reject the touch, but he found himself unable to move.

"You're not a particularly important captive," Starscream said, his voice as unexpectedly gentle as his touch. "Not command staff, no one with any special security clearance. You have nothing to offer the Decepticons."

Skyfire's stiffened, doing his best to hide the hitch in his vents. He knew what happened to prisoners the Decepticons didn't need. And he'd seen how much Starscream enjoyed killing Autobots; those had turned out to be holograms, but Starscream hadn't known that when he destroyed them.

Would he enjoy killing Skyfire too? Would it be fast, or did he prefer to take his time when possible? Could Skyfire kick him away and do enough damage to keep Starscream from coming after him? He didn't want to hurt Starscream like that, but he didn't want to  _ die _ either. And if it didn't work, it was better to go down fighting, wasn't it? That was what the other Autobots would do.

Before he could find the courage to act on the thought, Starscream drew back from him. Rain pinged against his frame once more, making him shiver.

"On your knees," Starscream ordered. Skyfire raised his head. Starscream now stood a few steps away from him, and one of his rifles was pointed at Skyfire.

Skyfire sat frozen, optics fixed on the mouth of the weapon. All thoughts of fighting had vanished, leaving a black pit of dread behind. There was no way out. He was going to die.

Slowly, awkwardly, he maneuvered himself onto his knees without use of his hands. He was trembling from fear and cold both, but he didn't try to stop it. It didn't matter what Starscream thought of him.

"Head to the ground," Starscream said. There was no emotion in his voice, or on his face.

"Starscream…" Skyfire hesitated, unsure of what he even wanted to say. He gave up and did what he was told, huddling on the ground at Starscream's feet. He shut off his optics again and waited for pain.

Starscream approached him slowly, then fingers brushed over his arms, fumbling with the cuffs. Shock and confusion swept through Skyfire, but he held himself perfectly still, not even venting. A soft  _ click _ sounded behind him, then the cuffs scraped over his plating as they were jerked away. Starscream was gone in a swirl of wind and rain, leaping back from Skyfire.

Skyfire drew his arms under him, wincing at the pain in his shoulders from holding one position for so long, and cautiously sat up. Starscream once again stood a short distance away, one rifle aimed at Skyfire and the cuffs dangling in his other hand. But though his stance was combat-ready, he no longer looked confident or commanding. There was something nervous about him, like he expected Skyfire to attack now that he was free.

Free. Skyfire gingerly rubbed one scraped wrist, too dazed from the whiplash of fear to confusion to do anything else except stare at Starscream.

"Why?" he asked finally.

"Like I said, you're of no use to the Decepticons." Starscream stowed the cuffs in his subspace, but kept his rifle leveled at Skyfire. "Now get out of here before I change my mind."

Skyfire didn't move. He wasn't sure he could get up if he tried, never mind walk away. Not with how badly he was shaking.

Starscream's expression softened slightly. Or maybe it was a trick of the light. Either way, he lowered his weapon and stepped back. Just like that, the savage Decepticon warrior was gone, leaving behind the Seeker who looked so much like the one Skyfire loved. But that Starscream had never looked so tired. So defeated.

"I'm sorry." Starscream's voice was so quiet that Skyfire wouldn't have understood the words if he hadn't seen his lips form them. Starscream turned away, and something in Skyfire clenched.

"Wait!" Skyfire made it back to his knees and extended a hand toward Starscream, not thinking about what he was doing.

Starscream didn't even look back. He threw himself into the air and transformed, rocketing away before Skyfire could say anything more. Skyfire sank back on his heels and let his hand drop.

He watched the sky long after Starscream had disappeared from sight, not caring about the rain that fell on his face. It rolled down his cheeks, as cold as his tears were hot, until he finally lowered his head into his hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for any broken hearts.


End file.
